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My name is Nick and I’d be remiss if I didn’t share a remarkable Spanksgiving story during this horny holiday season. You probably remember me as the guy lucky enough to explore the murky depths of my teenage niece’s mystery cave. Or perhaps you know me as the man with the thick cock and gorgeous head of hair, even though I’m in my 40s. Either way, I’d like to share a story about my more sensitive side.Just kidding.This story is about sticking my sneaky snake into a couple of the finest serpent silos in South Florida. But before we get to the man-meat of this story, I need to tell you about one of my favorite holidays of the year – Spankgiving.Every year for Thanksgiving, my wife Margaret travels to Minnesota to visit her father, Al. What I’m most thankful for is that my wife lets me stay home. You see, Al and I do not get along. Back in 2014, he tried to stab me with a carving fork over a dispute about the best Lethal Weapon movie.Anyway, ever since that fateful day, I’ve celebrated Spanksgiving. What is Spanksgiving, you ask, dear reader?With the house all to myself, I fix myself a Hungry Man TV dinner with turkey, mashed potatoes, and that delicious nuked brownie. After downing a 12-pack of Natural Light, I turn on my favorite porno and pound my dick harder than Charles Bronson beating the hell out of a prison guard.What is my favorite porno, you ask? I’m proud to say that it’s my own creation. I edited the best dirty parts out of my favorite Hollywoody movies and recorded them into one perfect penile-pumping video. It’s a beautiful compilation including Sharon Stone’s hip lips, Phoebe Cates’s teenage bikini bumpers, and Mila Kunis using her tongue to part the fleshy fire flaps on Natalie Portman’s furry female furnace. Among other genital gems, of course.After Margaret left for the frozen north, I headed to the store to stock up on Hungry Man dinners. Imagine my dismay when all that was left in the frozen section were vegetarian options.Fuck a duck, I thought to myself. Yet another sign this country is going straight to hell in a handbasket.Fortunately, there was still plenty of Natural Light left on the shelves. When I got home, I used my phone to look for local dinner delivery options. I ended up ordering the “beef stick in a bun” sandwich from Marty’s Meathole, a local diner known for its slogan, “Never let your meat https://escortium.org loaf at Marty’s Meathole.”After putting a bottle of Jergens and a box of tissue on my coffee table, I popped in my video, settled into my Lay-Z-Boy recliner, and popped open a cold one. Lifting my can, I toasted myself by saying out loud, “Happy Spanksgiving to me!” Then I whipped out my purple turkey baster and let the festivities begin.By the time the pool scene from Wild Things was playing, my splattering ram was about to break the fourth wall. Suddenly, there was a knock at the door.The food!I put my veiny meat dagger back in the sheath and answered the door. There, holding a plate of chocolate chip cookies, was my neighbor’s wife Natalie.She smiled, held out the cookies, and said, “Hi, neighbor! Happy Thanksgiving!”Natalie looks like she could have stepped off the set of Stepford Wives, complete with the vintage 1950s dress, high heels, and blonde hair all done up like a pinup model. She’s always so dolled up, I was never able to figure out whether she was in her twenties or thirties, but it was hard not to notice Natalie’s hourglass figure testing the integrity of the seams holding her dress together.Taking the plate of cookies, I said, “Well, hello there Natalie. Happy Thanksgiving to you. How’s your husband?”Natalie clasped her hands and looked down at her feet, “Oh, well… I guess you wouldn’t know… Larry left me about a month ago.”“Holy fuck, Natalie, why the hell would that nerdy little fuck leave a looker like yourself?”“He left me for his secretary.”“Holy hell, he’s a fucking janitor. Why the hell would he have a secretary?”“Well, Nick, he’s the maintenance manager at the largest hotel in Central Florida, but thank you, I appreciate what you’re trying to do… It’s okay.”But it wasn’t okay because Natalie started crying.Fuck a duck, here come the waterworks.Being the gentleman I am, I invited Natalie inside and sat her down on my living room sofa. I set down the plate of cookies on the coffee table and grabbed her a tissue, doing my best to hide the bottle of lotion behind a wedding photo.I’d never really noticed before, but Natalie really was a looker. Toned long legs, full lips, and perfectly manicured from head to toe. I began to wonder whether she manicured her slobber pocket with the same precision care.Consoling jilted wives isn’t exactly my strong suit, so I said, “Can I get you something? I’m drinking a beer if you want one.”“Do you have any wine?”“Yeah, I’m pretty sure Margaret has a few bottles of white zin in the kitchen. I’ll grab you a glass.”As I’m walking back out into the living room, wine glass in hand, Natalie says, “What’s this you’re watching on TV?”Right there paused on the screen, is Neve Campbell pouring champagne on Denise Richards’ naked mommy melons while Matt Dillon bruises her beef curtains.Handing Natalie the glass, I said, “Oh that’s the Macy’s Day Parade after-party.”The joke made Natalie laugh through her tears. I picked up the remote and turned off the TV.Natalie said, “Is Margaret home?”Sitting on the sofa next to Natalie, I said, “No. She’s up in Minnesota visiting her dad for Thanksgiving. I try to avoid her family like everyone else that’s ever met any of them.”Natalie took a sip of her white zin. “I’ve seen that movie that was on your TV. You can turn it back on. I didn’t mean to interrupt you.”Natalie leaned back on the sofa, her breasts heaving, cleavage on display. She crossed her sexy legs, her dress riding up above her knees. Staring at me seductively, it was obvious that opportunity was knocking, so I turned the TV back on and pressed play.After the Wild Things threesome finished, the sex scene from Body Heat played, followed by the one from Nine and a Half Weeks. If you remember, it’s the scene where Mickey Rourke attacks Kim Basinger’s pink fortress on a staircase in the pouring rain.Natalie’s eyes were glued to the screen while she took small sips from her glass of wine. When the hot scene between Gena Gershon and Jennifer Tilly from the movie Bound started playing, Natalie began fidgeting in her seat.Right about the time Gena was cleaning Jennifer’s fish tank with her tongue, Natalie looked over at me and said, “What movie is this?”“It’s a little something I put together for the holidays… A best-of collection of hot movie scenes.”Natalie’s husband may have left her, but it wasn’t because she was her elevator didn’t go to the top floor. Without missing a beat, she glanced over at me and said, “You were masturbating.”“Well, it’s a special holiday for me, Natalie. I call it Spanksgiving.”Turning her body to face me, Natalie said, “Can I watch?”“Well, sure doll, but in this house, there are no free shows. If you’re going to watch me shake hands with the milkman, you’re going to have to let me watch you soften the peach.”While the shower scene from Fifty Shades of Grey played on the TV, Natalie quickly reached under her skirt and pulled off her panties. Resting her back on the arm of the sofa, Natalie lifted one leg onto the cushion, her pearly gates on full display.I took a moment to give thanks. Natalie’s cock pocket was a cornucopia of plenty. She was entirely clean-shaven, exposing perfectly plump pussy lips that begged for a mouth to tease them.Natalie stared at me with a seductive gaze, waiting for me to take my turn. My Zamboni baloney was so hard, I struggled to pull it free from my zipper hole. When it was finally out, I grabbed it firmly around the base with one hand and used the other to start shucking the corn.Natalie celebrated the season by massaging the pilgrim with her index finger. Slow at first, until her lickety slit started to glisten. Then she began paddling the pink canoe with her other hand before using two fingers to spread her love lips like a turkey waiting to be stuffed. When Natalie plunged her fingers deep inside her pumpkin pie, she let out a little whimper that made me want to slather it with whipped cream.As the tension in her body raised to a fever pitch, Natalie aggressively pulled down her dress, revealing two of the most perfect buttered biscuits I’ve ever laid eyes on.We were both about to cum, totally lost in the moment, when somebody knocked at the door.Fuck a duck! NOW the food shows up!Natalie and I quickly put ourselves back together, like two kids swapping gravy in the backseat of an Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme when a cop unexpectedly shines a light through the window.“It’s the delivery guy. I ordered some food, I’ll be right back.” I said reassuringly as I got up to answer the door. In the chaos of the moment, I forgot to pause the video.Imagine my surprise when I opened the door and instead of a delivery guy, there was a delivery girl. In fact, the delivery girl was none other than Marty Meathole’s daughter Mariah, who I often saw shaking her fleshy seat pillows at the pool in our gated community.One thing that always struck me about Mariah, was how devilishly delicious she looked in her one-piece swimsuit. It was one of those french cut numbers with a g-string that exposed her gravity-defying ass and a bikini top that barely covered her areolas.
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